You're actually not entitled to anything

So many people out there feel themselves entitled to something.  It's not just the one percent feeling they're entitled to more than their fair share.  Whether it's minorities who feel entitled to a pedestal because of slavery or the working class who feel entitled to higher wages to escape poverty, EVERYONE feels entitled to SOMETHING.  I myself feel that if I'm forced to give my wages to Social Security and welfare services,  I should be entitled to use them when I need to.

But I can't.   I'm very poor, true, but I'm an able bodied single woman  with no dependents so even if I do have to live on Ramen noodles, I don't qualify for assistance.  The painful truth no one wants to admit is, NO ONE is entitled to ANYTHING.

We like to think we are.  We constantly bemoan our situation.  We say we're entitled to freedom, to life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness.  We deserve to make enough money, to live in a safe environment, to have goods and services.  We deserve the right to free speech and to have a democratically elected government.  We deserve good roads to drive on and enough food to eat, electricity and running water and libraries and even PBS.

But we're not.  Truth is, the things we want out of life, the things we think we deserve, they don't just magically appear.  SOMEONE at some point had to WORK to make those things happen.  SOMEONE built and maintains our roads and public services.  SOMEONE fought a war for our freedom.  SOMEONE created our government from scratch and SOMEONE created Social Security and welfare programs to help the poor.  SOMEONE is working right now to keep our neighborhoods safe.  EVERYTHING we have today is because someone WORKED to make it happen.

If you want a better life, you can't sit on your ass waiting for one to come along.  You have to make it happen.  Yes, you will struggle.  Yes, you may not get as far as you want to.  Yet if you don't do ANYTHING, then you don't get ANYTHING.

And if we WANT to keep having the things we think we deserve, then SOMEONE will have to WORK to keep them.  Guess what.  That someone is you and me.

Retirement isn't for the poor.

You hear it all the time.  Old people aren't retiring the way they used to and it's keeping young people from finding jobs.  The young are so quick to blame the old for high unemployment, but the old have bills to pay too.  The problem isn't that 60 year olds don't WANT to retire, but that they CAN'T.

The days of pensions are gone.  The few jobs that have them are fazing them out.  Heck, pensions bankrupted Detroit and everyone is scrambling to keep that from being the new norm.   Your retirement savings is up to you and only you, like it or not.  But not all of us are in jobs that pay well enough to allow for savings.

And that's where the real threat to retirement is.  The majority of working people live paycheck to paycheck.  Every last dime is used.  We all want to save, but we all want the lights to stay on too.  Saving up for retirement requires money.  When you don't have spare money, you can't save.  When you can't save for retirement, you can't retire so you work either until your body gives up on you and you're forced out or you die.  That's reality.

It also takes money to play the stock market or buy rental property which are huge risks that most working class folks can't afford to take.

So I don't blame the old for needing to work longer.  I understand that I won't be able to retire either.  I even understand that Social Security isn't the answer to my future money woes.

Corporate America used to take care of their workers, valued their workers.  Not with pensions necessarily, but with fair pay.  Then they placed their own greed over their workers' well being and called it capitalism.  They kept making their fortunes, but at our expense.

So young folks complaining about old folks keeping jobs away from you, don't blame the old.  Blame their bosses.

Cashiers are human too

As a former cashier, I know all too well how horrible a job cashiering can be.  The hours are terrible, the pay is worse and to add salt to your wounds, then you have the customers to deal with.  I don't know what it is about being a customer, about shopping in general that makes us lose our humanity.  I've had customers scream at me, throw things at me and generally be hateful and unpleasant.  Maybe that's just the kind of people shopping in my part of the world, but I have a good feeling that the problem of the hateful customer is universal no matter where they are shopping.

There is a well known saying drilled into every cashier's head: The customer is always right.  Whoever came up with that never cashiered a day in their life.  The customer is only interested in one thing.  They want to get a lot, pay as little as possible for it and to do this as quickly as possible. Money and time consumes us all and it drives us to do some pretty ugly things. When we grab the wrong shampoo and realize at the register that it isn't the one on sale, we will throw a tantrum to force the cashier to give it to us on sale because we can't admit we're wrong and it's too big a hassle to go get the right item.  When the store is out of cranberry sauce on Thanksgiving Day, we will demand that someone pull a can out of their ass because we want our cranberry sauce.  And if the cashier is anything less than cheerful when we act like rude jerks and throw our tantrums, we don't hesitate to call a manager and demand they be fired.

We stop looking at people as human beings the moment they become our servants.  They exist solely to do what we tell them to no matter how irrational it is.  They don't have feelings.  They don't have dignity. Being a customer is the ultimate power trip and everyone likes feeling powerful- especially those who aren't used to it.  That doesn't make it right to treat someone like crap.  You, even when you're a customer at the most high end store ever, are just as human and no better than the cashier.

People tend to blame their anger at the register on poor customer service.  I say poor customers lead to poor customer service.  People don't go into cashiering wanting to be rude.  They're driven their by misuse.  There's only so much crap you can take at poverty wages before you get angry and stop caring about doing a good job.  It's human to rebel.

And it's easier to show kindness when kindness is shown to you.  It takes a better person to show kindness in the face of hate, but we aren't all better people, are we.  The bottom line this holiday shopping season is don't check your humanity at the door.  Think of the person on the other side of the register (whatever side you happen to be on) and treat them with the respect you would want them to show you.  Cashiers are humans too.

Obamacare: Missing The Point

I've often asked people who hate Obamacare what is the difference between being forced to buy car insurance and being forced to buy health insurance.  The answer is always the same.  People need to have car insurance because they can have an accident and need to be able to pay for it.  But we don't get sick and need to be able to pay the doctor?  They often say that it's taking away their freedom by forcing them to buy a type of product.  Again, mandatory car insurance is forcing you to buy a product.  They say that forcing insurers to cover a person regardless of their medical condition or ability to pay for insurance will drive the cost up.  I say, if it does, insurance companies are assholes and these are all stupid arguments. 

I don't fault Obamacare for wanting to change a broken system so that everyone can use it regardless of income.  I have a problem with mandatory health insurance because it doesn't solve the problem that is healthcare in the US.

Let's consider what an insurance company really is.  They're a middle man that you pay so that if you have an accident they can use the money you paid them to "help" you pay any expenses.  Question.  Why do you need the middle man?  Why is the cost of healthcare so exorbitant that you can't afford to pay your bills without using the middle man?

The real problem with healthcare in the US and across the world is greed, that old crux of humanity that makes us act selfishly at the expense of others.  People don't become doctors because they genuinely want to heal the sick.  They become doctors because they want the large paycheck that comes with it.  Pharmaceutical companies make pills for pennies and charge hundreds of dollars for them in order to rake in billions in profits.  The healthcare industry is too busy profiting off the pain of others that they've forgotten they're supposed to be helping them.  Imagine a world where instead of doctors we had healers.  Imagine a world where healing was considered an honor, a noble profession that one took up because they wanted to help and not because they wanted a mansion.

In a world like that, where profit took a back seat, costs would be a lot lower.  There would still be a cost, but it would be a fair cost and not one over inflated to milk as much money from you as possible.  Remember the $12 aspirin?  What do you think the motivation behind that is?

Another aspect driving up costs are the status symbols associated with being a wealthy doctor.  Why do you need marble countertops and travertine floors in a doctor's office?  Why do you need giant flat screen tvs in every room?  Because if you're greedy enough to desire to be rich, you want to flaunt it and that means you need more money to pay for it all.  I would rather have linoleum floors and functioning equipment over travertine.   I want the money I'm paying to go to my care and not toward making the doctor look good. Plus eliminating unnecessary bells and whistles will bring costs down.

Another factor is that so many people are in such bad shape that they have to use the system no matter how bad it is.  If folks took better care of themselves, ate right and exercised, they wouldn't have all the health issues that keep them slaves to the industry.  Other than regular check ups and emergencies, they wouldn't use the system as much.  This puts the power in the hands of the patients because doctors can't be millionaires without patients to pay their salaries.  If they had to come to us, the competition could very well keep costs down. 

Perhaps the biggest problem facing us is the amount of apathy toward the problem.  People are afraid to shake up the status quo.  They fall victim to the industry's threats and shy away from anything that would hurt the industry's power in response.  As much as they complain, all the talk of death panels and what not keeps them from action.

And that is the problem with healthcare.  Greedy little bastards financially raping the sick and a populace that is too stupid to take care of themselves or fight back.

But if we could change it, if we could turn doctors into healers and remove the greed, then everyone could have healthcare when they needed it.  Once the costs were low, people wouldn't need insurance companies because they could afford to pay their bills on their own.

I'm told by those who hate Obamacare that we have the best healthcare system in the world and shouldn't mess with it.  What is the point of having the best healthcare in the world if no one can afford to use it?  Bringing costs down requires a radical change in thinking but it's a needed change and the only way to solve the healthcare problem.  Will Obamacare be that change?  No.  Because it misses the point.  We should be focussing on changing the people running the scam that is the healthcare industry and not on getting more people to use middle men to pay for it.

My low opinion of Syria

Syria is yet another backwards Middle Eastern country ruled by an evil dictatorship.  That appears to be the norm in that part of the world, but what do you expect when you allow religion to run your government?  But Assad, the evil power hungry tyrant that he is, may or may not have used chemical weapons on his own people and America, the world's savior, cannot tolerate that.

Here's the thing for me though.  Assad and his goons have been killing his detractors since they first began fighting for their freedom.  The rest of the world just gave the rebels some more guns and sat back and watched.  Suddenly chemical weapons come in the picture and we're like "Hey! That's not right!" and say we need to bomb them.  Why now?  Why not 2 years ago?  Does it matter how a massacre is carried out or that a massacre happens?

Let's be honest.  The US has never gone to war over something that didn't serve US interests and preventing chemical weapons from getting into the hands of their enemies is a very big interest.  It only took the possibility of Hussein having weapons to convince the world to attack Iraq.  We have incontrovertible proof that Syria has chemical weapons, but the rest of the world is fine not doing anything about that. So that is why America is beating the war drums now. Any lives they may save from Assad's tyrade is just a lucky happenstance.  The real goal is to protect the US from jihadists using chemical weapons on Americans.

But as much as I would like to see dangerous chemical weapons kept away from the crazy jihadists, I know that any US led military action in Syria is doomed to fail.  It will not stop the bad guys from getting the weapons.  It's a fact that a lot of the rebel fighters are affiliated with crazy jihadists.  It won't stop the war in Syria. There is no plan to remove Assad from power.  It WILL piss off the jihadists and increase anti west sentiment across the Middle East.   It WILL piss off Russia (and her tyrant in charge) into taking action against the US.  It WILL drag the US into another war it can't afford either financially or physically to fight.  It WILL cause tension and grief and wind up being as pointless as the wars in Iraq and Afghanistan.

So as noble as it may seem to want to stop the bloodshed and destroy the weapons, I can't support going to war in Syria.  It won't prevent innocents from dying and it won't serve the US well.

This shouldn't be America's fight.  The entire world should be dragging Assad out of office but they won't and why not? Because dictator Putin says no. Because it's in Russia's interest to keep Assad around.  Because Russia makes money off of Syria and making money is more important than stopping genocide.  The US can't fight this war alone and that is why they shouldn't. Russia needs to do the right thing, put the all mighty dollar aside and stop Assad from killing civilians. 

Sorry to the Syrians who are suffering.  Blame Russia.

Corey Montieth: not an idol.

I would be lying if I said I was not offended that Corey Montieth's death is being treated like a national tragedy.  Why are people holding vigils for him like he's some sort of hero?  He's yet another celebrity drug addict that died from their own stupidity.   Why do we worship these kinds of people?  Why do we celebrate their talents oblivious to their faults? So John Belushi was funny. He sqaundered that on drugs.  River Phoenix, died too soon thanks to addiction.  Corey Montieth?  Same train wreck.  If celebrity addicts should teach us anything, it's that fame shouldn't give you an easy ride or absolve you of your sins.  It should teach us that celebrities aren't any better than the rest of us.

We have an epidemic in this country. We are a society that not only condones drug abuse but encourages it with disastrous consequences.  Drug addiction destroys lives and we just let it.  In some states, we even fought to legalize it.  We shouldn't admire bad behavior.  We certainly shouldn't give weepy speeches about how much the dead drug addict deserves to be admired by his legions of followers.  If anything his admirers should be angry and disappointed at how stupid he was to use drugs. His girlfriend should feel guilty for not doing more to help him kick his addiction and then use her star power to help others kick theirs.

Instead of immortalizing celebrity bad behavior, we should learn from it.  We should work harder to fight drug addiction.  We should mourn Corey Montieth's loss as we mourn the loss of any human, but we should not forget the reason he died or over look the lesson just because he could sing.  We shouldn't even be criticized for not worshipping celebrity addicts like Corey Montieth.

Our role models say a lot about who we are as a person.  They should say something good about us.  The tragedy of Corey Montieth's death, like Belushi and Phoenix and countless others, isn't that he was a talented man cut down in his prime.  It's that he did it to himself and we sat back and watched.

The reason you can't find a job may be you

I live in the hood.  I see the hood everyday.  I interact with the various characters (so stereotypical it's scary) that are an all too common sight and I have come to the conclusion that the biggest reason why unemployment is so high in the hood is because of the attitudes prevalent among those who inhabit the hood and the perceptions those attitudes have created in society.

Hear me out before you start accusing me of prejudice.

Let's take an honest look at the hood, shall we.  The hood is a barren wasteland of decay, a wild outlaw state filled with hardships and danger that have embittered and corrupted the hearts and minds of the people who are unfortunate enough to be trapped there.  It is a prison for the impoverished because once you are there, once you are faced with that level of poverty, your options for escape are very few.  It's easy to fall into despair, to give up and become hardened and jaded and so many people do.

But by doing that, they take on the very persona that will hold them back, that keeps them from success and ultimately traps them even more.   They start to ACT like they are from the hood.

What does it mean to act like you're from the hood?  It means you lose your moral code.  You skew your ethics to accommodate your situation.  You stop caring about the things that can help you like education or hard work because you don't see the point in trying. You aren't getting big enough rewards, no instant gratification so you don't bother.  You don't mind breaking a few laws because that is the only way you feel empowered.  You may over drink or do drugs because you are desperate for relief from the hardships.  You feel you have to behave certain ways, dress certain ways in order to fit in - bad attitudes and pants sagging so low you need two pairs of boxers to cover yourself and are forced to waddle when you walk which for some strange reason, you think is cool.  There is rampant drug use and crime and gang violence and drama.  Bad weaves and fake nails.  All of it is handled with that horrible bad attitude, with an often misplaced and violent anger and a nonchalance that leaves a bad taste in the mouth when they aren't trying to pick a fight to prove how hard they are.  In other words, you take on aspects that are unappealing to everyone outside the hood because some rapper made a song about it and you mistakenly believe you are supposed to act that way.  Don't even get me started on ebonics.

Mainstream society sees these bad behaviors and forms a very negative opinion.  They say, if you're from the hood you must be low class, uneducated, lazy workers and can't be trusted.  As horrible as that sounds, a lot of the time it ends up being true because, once again, those in the hood accept that they are supposed to be that way.  We know not every one in the hood is ghetto trash, but so many people act like ghetto trash that it's hard to give someone the benefit of the doubt once you know where they're from.  Stereotypes are not only dangerous, they are hard to get rid of.

But what do employers look for in future employees?  For starters, they look at your appearance.   They want someone who wears their pants correctly or doesn't have a skirt so short they need a second hair net.  They want a clean appearance.  Not too much make up or grills in your mouth .  They want nails that are not six inches long.  They look at the way you speak.  Good grammar matters.   It tells the employer that you will be able to communicate well with customers or coworkers.  Once you have a job, the way you behave at work matters as well.  Those who do a good job get ahead while those who do the minimum required because they're too busy gossiping don't.  Your on the job behavior can also determine whether or not your former employer puts in a good word for you when whatever job you're applying for next asks them.  This happens.

Employers judge you the moment they see you.  If you don't physically make the grade, you probably won't get another chance.   They judge you by your initial behavior so you have to check your ghetto-tude at the door.

Finally, education is invaluable.   You're being hired for the skills you have so it may be a good idea to actually get some skills.  That means not only going to school but paying attention while you're there.

In short, if someone in the hood wants to gain a job, they need to lose the hood inside them.  Pull your pants up, learn proper English and stay in school.   Avoid crime and teen pregnancy.  If you want a potential employer to take YOU seriously, then you must take THEM seriously.

Sometimes you have to look at yourself honestly and say maybe the problem isn't them.  Maybe the problem is you.  You can be poor and still have class.  You can be poor and still be an honest person. You can be poor and still have an education.  You don't have to be hood just because you were born there and I really really REALLY hope more people in the hood would recognize that.