The importance of spanking

You will never convince someone who holds a grudge against their parents that spanking in a calm and nonviolent way is not child abuse.  That spanking in a calm and nonviolent way in conjunction with a calm and nonviolent discussion of why you're being spanked is a vital tool of parenting.

We are a nation of wusses and our misbehaving hellions running amok bears that out.

30 years ago, kids weren't saints but open aggression wasn't the norm.  Prior to the 1960s, it was unheard of.  Why?  Parents used to discipline their children and we were better for it.

Not like today when even talking loudly to your child when they're throwing a tantrum can get you arrested for child abuse.  The problem we have today is that we've become so pussified that we don't know the difference between discipline and abuse anymore.  All those after school specials painting horrible pictures of parents going too far have traumatized us.

I'm not advocating child abuse.  I'm not saying it's ok to beat your kids.  I'm not saying time out is entirely pointless and I'm glad we have laws to protect children from people who do go too far.  I'm simply saying that spanking has a gotten an unnecessary bad rap.  I'm saying that when done out of love, a few light taps with the hand on the backside isn't criminal.

What's criminal is not bothering to discipline your kids because you're afraid it might be misconstrued as abuse.  It's criminal to think your children learn anything from a few minutes staring at a wall.

Because they don't.  Even when you tell them why you're making them stare at a wall, it doesn't teach them anything.  Why?  Because no one fears a wall.  There has to be bad consequences for bad behavior or you learn nothing from doing it.

Ah, you say.  It's wrong to teach children respect by intimidation and fear.  It only causes them to lash out and be more aggressive.  Fear is child abuse.  That's what you're saying.

And in some ways, you can be right.  Terrorizing your children doesn't teach them anything either,  but in order to teach right from wrong, you have to program behavior.  That means rewarding good behavior and punishing bad behavior.  Punishment only works when the child finds being punished unfavorable.  When they don't like it.  What do we feel when we don't like something?  Fear of it and a healthy fear of bad things is a good thing, a defense mechanism hard wired into our DNA.  It teaches us to avoid bad things and protect ourselves.

There's nothing wrong with our children not wanting to be punished.  That's the point of punishing them.  So they don't do the things that get them punished.

Spanking is quick and it's effective when done in conjunction with an explanation.  It's been effective for centuries.

Look, I know not everyone feels comfortable with spanking.  Not everyone trusts themselves to know when to stop, but don't criticise the ones who do.  Don't condemn parents who love their children enough to spank them when they do wrong.

The knock out game?  Kids do that.  Illegal pool parties that result in police officers being assaulted by teens.  Why do you think we need police officers in schools?  The fact that so many kids do drugs, have sex or commit crimes is proof we are failing our children.

Because we're scared to discipline them.

Pity the future.